16. A Rich Jerk
In my previous role as a personal concierge at a top Maldives resort. I catered to ultra-rich guests who vacationed there, arriving in private jets. One family even kept a super yacht moored year-round, using it only once annually. Yet, one particularly ridiculous story surpassed them all.
Once, I was tasked with looking after Mr. Sergei Popov. Abillionaire on the Forbes rich list who resides in Switzerland with his wife and children. The arrival list indicated he would be accompanied by a woman who wasn’t his wife. When he arrived in Malé via his private jet from Geneva. There were several transportation options to reach the resort: a 45-minute speedboat journey. A 40-minute yacht transfer, or a 12-minute seaplane ride. Sergei opted for the seaplane. I secured this job because of my proficiency in four languages – Russian, English, Thai, and Mandarin. As I waited at the seaplane pier for his arrival, I prepared for the meet and greet.
As they disembarked from the seaplane, I greeted them in Russian, and they responded in English. They maintained a certain distance, reflecting their status. We boarded a golf buggy, and I provided a tour of the island, where we eventually arrived at their villa. Despite it being in the second-most luxurious category, they expressed dissatisfaction. To ensure their comfort, I escorted them to the only available presidential villa, which they ultimately found to their liking.
They agreed to the extra $12,000 per night for the upgrade. Bringing their total to $27,000 per night for the 10,000-square-foot villa with all its amenities. Including a private mobile phone with a direct line to me 24/7 until their departure. This marked the beginning of some extravagant requests. For his mistress’s upcoming 33rd birthday, he wanted a lavish surprise organized with no budget constraints—I handled that. He also requested a reserved seat at the bar every evening. Despite our policy against saving seats—I made arrangements for that, too. Additionally, when his niece flew in the next morning. He expected me to meet her and escort her to her detached private villa on the resort.
When I saw her, it became clear what was going on. She stepped off the seaplane wearing a full-length mink coat in sweltering 100+ degree heat. Carrying only a purse and no other luggage. It was evident she wasn’t his “niece”. Despite this, she requested to go directly to the boutique to purchase new clothes suitable for the tropical island. Including several bikinis and other attire. After shopping, I escorted her to the villa where her “uncle” and his mistress were conspicuously absent. Taking her passport, I confirmed she had turned 18 just eight days prior.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was playing the “nice uncle” role while being suspicious. The next morning, during breakfast, the housekeeping team called me to the villa. Stepping in, I was shocked to find the main bedroom in disarray—dirty sheets had to be replaced. And bottles and wrappers littered the room. Sergei then informed me that his supposed niece was leaving. Despite everything, I found myself strangely drawn to this captivating and carefree young woman.
It was now time for the mistress’s birthday. And I had orchestrated a private barbecue at a pavilion overlooking the Indian Ocean specifically designed for such occasions. To enhance the ambiance, I imported 100 pounds of rose petals from Sri Lanka. As they do not naturally grow in the Maldives. I used these petals to carpet the path leading to the pavilion. Where hundreds of candles floated on the water in transparent fishbowl-like globes, creating a magical setting.
Tchaikovsky’s music filled the air as a bottle of Grand Cru Rothschild was carefully decanted. A personal chef, waiter, and waitress stood ready, and I was on standby. During dinner, Sergei expressed heartfelt gratitude to everyone, and we thanked him for the $14,000 dinner. The next day, they spoke to me in Russian like an old friend. Sharing departure plans and handing me a $2,000 tip for their seven-day stay.
Sergei’s total expenditure for the seven-day stay amounted to $230,000.
